In today’s hustle and bustle, family dinners are often thrown together without much acknowledgment outside of “get everyone fed.” And, that makes sense.

Of course, being fed is priority. But, we’ve lost connection as a society to other parts that make a meal. It is not just about ingesting the food and ensuring full bellies.

Let’s jump back hundreds to thousands of years. During these times, life moved slower. To eat, one had to collect, harvest, forage, or hunt their foods. Many meals were eaten by firelight and consumed with the energy, appreciation and knowledge of where that food came from.

Today, the most we know is that food came from the grocery store and package. Then, it went into our gullets. We know it provides what we need. However, we lack insight into what we’re eating. We also have no intention about how we are consuming it.

Eating on a Timeline. Where the fuck are we going?

When life was about hunting and gathering, there was no fast-paced eating. We did not rush to get to the next scheduled activity. It just was. Life just was.

Now, it doesn’t feel like life just is. It feels hurried and in transit at all times. Even when I don’t have anywhere to be, my nervous system feels like it. My programming feels pressured to eat quickly and get onto the next agenda item.

Our society has created a food paradigm to fit our busy needs. Cool – thanks for adjusting to our madness, but is it really necessary?

Question the Narrative.

We’re programmed to conform to society so we stay alive. Literally – we conform at a young age so we survive.. If we were to do differently, it could literally feel like death. But, we are at a point in civilization. The norm of how we do things is actually destroying us as a human race. The way we run now, is not how we always have. We feel very comfortable with being cared for. We have lost sight of what it means to be human. We are no longer in touch with our bodies and needs.

Meals weren’t always KFC, TV and shoveling in food. It was once fire lit, slow, connected and savoring. The magic lies in slow, we’ve just lost sight of this truth. This truth still lives in all of us, just dormant, waiting to be awoken.

JUST BECAUSE IT’S NORMAL DOESN’t MAKE IT “RIGHT”.

We’re shoving ourselves into meals. Loading up on tasty dishes full of who-knows-what, Piling our mouths and running to the next thing. Maybe in that next moment we will find what we’re seeking. The solitude, love, compassion and companionship that we didn’t get from the last moment. Well, did you find it in the next moment? I bet not.

I say this with full compassion and empathy of “I can fucking relate..”

I’ve been one to seek what I am looking for in the next moment. Never in this one. Definitely not in my fucking meal. I will shovel in so I can move on to what’s next.

For me, my meals had never been connected. I didn’t pay attention to myself or my food outside of what tasted good and was I full enough?

I have been exploring my food relationship and practicing mindful eating. This has revealed how much story and hurried-ness I create in my life.

Mindful Eating.

To sit and eat with intention, slow, collected and without mind chatter has been obsolete. Recently, I have started practicing being present in my body. I now am practicing to stay connected to my food throughout the cooking process and into the meal.

Candlelit Meals.

One thing I have begun incorporating regularly is candlelight – with all meals, but especially at dinner. During the winter months, the sun sets before I eat dinner. Candlelight creates a softening, comforting atmosphere during a meal. The low light is gentle on my nervous system. It allows a calming sensation to overtake me as I draw closer to bedtime.

5 Reasons to Embrace Candlelit Dinners with Your Family this Winter

1. Nervous System Regulation – . Blue light, especially from LEDs, causes disturbances throughout the entire body, effecting the regulation of the nervous system. Turning off or down our lights and creating lighting with candlelight is like a blanket to our system. It offers comfort and calm versus artificial lighting that creates “noise” and havoc on our system. Feeling like the kids are fucking crazy at dinner? Turn down the lights, turn on the soft instrumental music, light the candles and watch what happens. To add to that – consider a diffuser with calming oils along with nervous system nourishing whole foods.

2. Reduces Eye Disturbances and Disease – Blue light from lighting leads to disturbances and disease in the eyes (along with the rest of the body.) As the sun sets consider turning off your lighting, especially LEDs, and opt for candlelight at dinner. As cited from a National Institute of Health study, “This high energy blue light passes through the cornea and lens to the retina causing diseases such as dry eye, cataract, age-related macular degeneration, even stimulating the brain, inhibiting melatonin secretion, and enhancing adrenocortical hormone production, which will destroy the hormonal balance and directly affect sleep quality.” – https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6288536/

3. Simply because it is fucking beautiful. Yes, if nothing else, this can be reason enough. The beauty in fire light – there is nothing better. Let it create a magical scene for you and your family.

4. Instinctual, Ancestral – If you were to dig down deep and find what is buried, you’d find your heritage and instincts fucking screaming at you to calm it all down. All the noise, screen, lights, busyness – we weren’t meant for this. Take a step back, get quiet and calm the fuck down. We were built to eat our harvested food around fire light, enjoying the presence of one another because we had no where else to be. Chilll out. Take a breath. You were meant for this.

5.Fun and Different – Kids often love this! My son loves to be the “blower outer.” When meal time is done, he blows the candles out. I did need to set boundaries and I keep the candles on my side while we’re eating because the “blower outer” would get excited to blow them out beginning or mid meal.

It switches things up. offers kids something different than the lighting they’ve had all day. It gives you something to talk about.

Do you want to try it? Give it a go and comment below! I’d love to hear your experience with a candlelit dinner – whether its solo, couple or family!

From my journey to yours,

Anna